NO GODS NO MASTERS NO BOSSES NO BOYFRIENDS
home is on the highway living on soft bread and solace
this is a personal tumblr and i personally find myself boring as shit
I’m excited and confident I can make my way here.
i feel rather vulnerable, however I know this is because a lot of longstanding, behemoth emotional barriers are about to be shattered forever, cast away with the remnants of my former warped perspective. Love and trust will win in the end.
I’m so fucking happy im a stones throw from kathryn woo! <3
jfc you kids are so cute
i will visit soon promisepromisepromise!
you can pretend it’s aruba and wear bikinis!can underwear count as a bikini? I need to start on working my way toward making it acceptable to be naked all the time. I’m slacking on that because it’s 34 degrees out XD
when i’m with a luvver who lives alone i just walk around n00d, same in my room. like i am naked right now. LIBERATION!
so i just got back from the international students’ office and i got some good news and am surprised at how understanding the university is about my current circumstances. i was really scared about my immigration status, since i’m an international student, and i:
- am not capable of packing up all my shit and leaving university housing within 48 hours
- am not capable of basically being kicked out of the country in 15 days if i drop my classes
good news! which international students should keep in mind, because i am so happy about it. i’ll be taking a medically reduced course load, which can mean anything from being registered to less classes or even for 0 credits, in order to stay in the country and my housing until the end of the semester and continuing treatment with my current therapist who is amazing and i am so happy i have her. i’ll be dropping two of my three courses tomorrow (keep in mind i started this semester overloading: i was taking five classes - the maximum - and slowly started dropping them as things got too hard to handle)
on monday for my appointment, i need to get a note from my therapist about needing this medically reduced courseload! yay!
also, i still have time IF i do decide to have an incomplete for my course, to figure that out with my professor and figure out a better timeline for me to finish that course. which is great. so basically, if anyone is in the same position (it’s not as easy doing this being an international student vs. being a student whose parents live in the same city/state/country wherefore immigration issues don’t apply) i really really urge that you guys do that!
on parents. my dad is being very understanding. he’s even offered to come into boston for a daddy-daughter weekend because he’s concerned about me and doesn’t want me to feel lonely. i told him it’s okay, but maybe in two weeks i’ll have my papa come over. in all honesty, my dad hasn’t been father of the year for most of my life because he’s been working and working and working. he goes to work at 8 am and usually doesn’t come home until 9 pm. only after we moved to hungary did we start really trying to form a relationship that i am so grateful for. he’s on-call 24 hours a day if i ever need any help from him. that said, our relationship still needs a lot of work but it’s heading in the best direction i can hope for.
my mum isn’t being as great, BUT, i understand that she is very very very nervous about me taking medication and taking out her fears and anxieties on me. i personally think she’ll cool down and after a while understand (or attempt to) my choices regarding treatment and medication because, after all, i am a legal adult everywhere. i still would prefer not to live in indonesia over the summer, but to be honest if i want to pursue art i should be able to pursue it anywhere, be it boston, budapest, or jakarta.
i don’t care if this is the zoloft talking or if it’s a placebo effect or i’m just SO. FUCKING. RELIEVED. but things are finally looking up. i’m glad i made the necessary steps for my well-being. i really hope this can also help other people dealing with the same issues! for now, i’m just going to dork out and read up on every single possible option for me to return to school, not return to school, go to art school, or whatever.
positive vibesss!
etxartdmenosmestamatando
i want my life to just have world’s end girlfriend and godspeed you! black emperor playing in the background non-stop
